It’s time… September 29, 2008

So tomorrow I walk away from my job for the last time…it’s a very strange feeling…

I’m totally ready to do it and know it’s the right thing but it’s the people who make this hard.  I’ve met alot of really amazing, fun and interesting people through my work and it will gut me to leave them.  While I’ve obviously had my frustrations with work, I’ve also had the coolest experiences and some of the best banter there. 

But it’s definitely time to go…and many of my work friends have left a real legacy in my life which I can carry with me.

And then on Saturday – im off to India!!!

My prodigal song September 24, 2008

Five years ago when I was in the Philippines I went into a random music store and bought a random CD.  I’d never heard of the group or listened to any of their material – but something that day made me pick up their album.

The group are called ‘Stephen Speaks’, the album is ‘No More Doubt’, and there is this one track on it which affects me to my very soul.  Do you know when you get a song that just sums stuff up for you? Well this is that song for me. 

So I lost track of the CD…hadn’t heard the song in years and then this week I got handed a copy of it by a friend.  I guess it’s cool when you can look back and know how far you’ve been brought – and this song showed me that.  And it’s like it has now grown with me to become even more an expression of my story.  I can’t fully explain it and I don’t want it to even make sense fully to me – but as I get ready for new stuff happening in my life it just feels like my song. 

***

“What’ll She Look Like”what’ll she look like when she opens her eyes
and sees what she wants to see
instead of this cold mirror’s lies
and all the pieces complete
she says with a sign
“I think I’m ready…”
what’ll she sound like when she opens her mouth
and all the phrases sound right
as they fall out
and she says “yes” and she’s not
scared of the sound
she says she’s ready
will she be soft will she be strong
will she be ready to be wrong
will she move too fast or wait too long
will she look me in the eyes
what’ll it feel like when she opens her heart
and finds that there just might be
a small missing part
and whether with or without me
she has to start getting ready
what’ll she look like when she opens her eyes
will she see just what I see
will it be a surprise
to see that she hasn’t changed,
her eyes are just a little wider now
and she’s getting ready…

 

A rainbow of emotions and it’s only Tuesday… September 10, 2008

Expectant…excited…confused…encouraged…scared…pumped…freaked out…inspired…blown away…doubting…dreaming…

Just a tiny fraction of some of the emotions which have been circuiting my body and mind in the last week.

So I handed in my notice – totally a God thing.  So I’ve agreed to move up to Woodvale – totally a God thing.  Now I’m standing post-decisions looking out on a new vista which is both really beautiful yet really unsettling.

I hate that fear is even there…but I love love love the new angle to life God’s given me…and the exciting new views ahead.  Just totally praying I have the faith to go do this.

But above all else I am totally learning that Jesus is the dream-giver and the One who then brings little seeds of dreams to Life. I love that!  And when I re-read through old journals and see how He is bringing stuff to pass in my life I am beyond humbled. 

 It makes me wonder what dreams of His are out there for friends of ours, communities we’re a part of and nations we live in – how can we help see them come to Life?